Saturday, May 27, 2006

no future

i'm so busy..even aft the exams! doing my dnt lah.. haiz.. my new idea is ssoo crapy!!! oh god, pls help me!! the electronics used is freaking basic.. I HATE MY NEW IDEA!!!! damn it man!! i've given up on the old idea b'cos of the electronics being too complicated. haiz...

now is the only time i get to update my blog.. aft ages.. ok, i'm gonna write a long one!! just now went to bugis wif nadine, pei yun and wei jie, buy electronic stuff.. i c their projects like so cool like that.. then mine is ssoo crappy.. haiz.. bleah.. dnt occupies alot of my time this june hols.. obviously no slacking for me now. receiving my midyear results was so despressing, helo, girl!! reality check here!!! haiz.. welcum to the reality..slacking this half of the year when you are taking your o levels this year!!! gosh.. i really need to buck up man..

mum and cik sham is forcing me again! i must go to jc, jc, jc!!!! that's all that they are thinking about! 'u better work hard and stop wif ur band stuff! if u cant even go to poly and ended up in ite.. u better watch out! ur sis oredi get to grad frm poly... that's good u know..bla.. bla..bla..!!!!' why must they compare me wif sis?? if its so good, why hasnt she got a uni admission?? huh, why huh? i wonder..and why do you always blame my band?? why? this is wat i like to do! play music!! i love music! why cant you be like any other parents and encourage them? u dont even go to any of my performances before and even disallowed me to go! and if u like to compare sis wif me so much, by the way, her cca was horticulture club!! it gardening!! it is so different frm band so dont u compare it!! now u are disallowing me frm performing the last performance wif damai windz! it is so important to me!! the balloon hat festival is once in a year event in singapore, u know! in singapore! our band was even featured in tv mobile ok! EEERRGGHH!! its not that i didnt study wat! i did study to my best effort!! dont they know wat i'm feeling know? why cant they just understand me?? is it ssoo hard?

i do know they have a reason why they want me to go jc. not their fault. i just wish my family has more money so that i can go to my choice course. poor ppl like me will always stuck in this poverty cycle. i wish dad will get a job and realise that he's making my life miserable! sumtimes.. i tot of just quiting skool and just work. :( (and move out of the house!)

when i go to band, i get to forget all my probs...just play music. so syiok! sum more now step down oredi.. but i think my sec ones dont like me. i think its b'cos i scold them alot. hhmmpphh! they do mistakes i correct them! this is called training!! next year oredi syf! must get gold! haiz.. i guess, they dont understand it now. when they have bcome a senior then they will know wat i feel.

that's it lah.. later if write sum more ppl will get bored of me. chiao.