i am me. therefore i am.

long time no write...i'm sucklingly so tired...Just had cross country today in bedok reservoir..but i didn't run...the band performing. Even if i had run..there won't be any difference in the band's playing!! Even if i'm no more...no one would even notice....They tried to piss me off time and again...U all go and kiss my foot, butt and shit first ah before u want to piss me off!!!! suckers... Is my plaing that bad till i can't even play in syf??? ohh...i forgot!!! I'm just a walking statue who unfortunately could play the euphonium but sadly no music can come out...So..it doesn't qualify to go to syf!! Too bad....

There's common test every week...making me a walking zombie. And cik sham asking me why i had failed 2 tests...Only want me to get first in class but never appreciated or value my hard work. Never think how much slogging and sacrifice i had done...Shit!!! I had tried my best right?? Wat u want me to do?? Cheat in the tests is it?? Then mum didn't let me go to bintan for a social studies trip...it's only $125!!! And i'll be using my own money!! For goodness sake i don wanna use your money!!! The money in my bank account are all from the scholarships that i had won!! My own hard work!! Wat's wrong with that?? I'm not going there to enjoy, to study history!! For God's sake, I'm 15!!!!!!!!! Not 5 years old!!!!!!!!

Those suckers...I tried to think positive.... I tried to convince myself that u are doing this for the band's sake...but your actions totally contradicts with wat i thought... Wat is this?? When u play...u purposely play loudly so that all of them could hear how well u play..But when u all played wrong notes want to piss me off...u will not play so people hear SHAHEERA playing so ugly!! And i'll be accused of play badly... And mr wong..doesn't even noe my name... even when they need a librarian and i'm in front of me..they will not approach me....OOhhh...i forgot again.. I'm just a statue...

Unfortunately...this statue's ears are not yet deaf...and i'm not dumb...i'm just stupid... watch out suckers...