so how?

my minds says go on. my determination is still going on strong. it says, dont give up. but my physical body says thats it. i cant take anymore. so this is like the third time in feb alone i am sick again. isey bedah.. how?



no more panadols la. i hate that white stuff.



chiao.

aaahhhhhhhhhhhh

eupho gals. look at the pile of scores infront of us. intonation sessions are the worst but the most important!

zomg!!!!! poser!!!! bored by waiting for our intonation parts to be written on the board. so we made noises and started playing with our phones.

they took it aft sectionals!!!on put it as my wallpaper on my phone. tskkk.... thick skin people. haha.

and.... it was v-day on thurs. yay, i got roses. and band prac was awesome that day although i had dc before that. haha. dr lee was in a superr good mood. but it was the opposite on sat. talked alot of nonsense, sang on the way to mrt and laughed non-stop on the train.

after running the race. we were bored... b'cos we finished early. ehhemmm.. hahaha.

a myriad of events happening this week. makes go aaaaaahhhh. hahaha. cross country on wed. and tct won the champion house. haha, wow. and i think they should have made cross country at bedok reservoir. haha. all the east people will be on cloud nine.



and guess what! gp terms is next week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

me=dead.

chiao.

why oh why!

huh.. its sun already? why oh why???????????? i was just starting to enjoy myself. wah lau...
and terms is in 2 weeks time. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. i vow to get at least C for all my subjects. hhmm maybe thats quite a high target. nvm, aim high.

i'm trying to forget what happened. i guess nobody's perfect and i should live on. depend on no one except myself. and i cant wait for band practice. 5 days without my eupho feels like torture.

i guess now i can appreciate all those long slow orchestra peices. its quite nice actually. i use to wonder why some people can listen to 30mins of piano concertos without falling asleep. now i know why. i guess u have to go through the musical muturity yourself then you'll understand the beauty of orchestra music.

since i was quite free, i started thinking. whats the singificance of us living on earth? why do we continue to live on despite all the challenges and obstacles that we face almost everyday? i think i know the answer now. :)

ohw..can i have another week of holiday. ragh.

chiao.

Dikir 2008

here's the the dikir pictures. :))))))))))))))))))))))))










oh lalala. our dikir performance. melayu power sehhh.



baek ahhh. eh wahh.

pachelbel frangipani and white lilies

i thought i should light up this blog with something more cheerful. :) ah, beautiful.

pachelbel's canon in d is making me go high. schubert's serenade too.ah. they make me feel serene, relaxed. aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

wonders of music. it makes me feel better. sooo much.

chiao.

why?

i feel like i have so much to say but now, i'm kinda clueless. ok, first things first, dikir barat was awesome. i really enjoyed myself on stage. now, i am voiceless due to all the shouting and screaming that i did for the last few days.but i was almost late for school. oh well what the hell.

this will be quite a different post than the previous one. i miss doing what i love most. like drawing and drawing and drawing and drawing. and no one sees or critises it. b'cos what i draw is a reflection of what i feel at that time. talking about feelings...

i may not be a loving person b'cos i dont know how to show people that i love them. but that doesnt mean i dont love you. i am not the kind of girl who says i-love-u-s to people and give them hugs whenever they want or say you are my sunshine or mushy stuff like that. just b'cos i dont do all this doesnt mean i have no feelings just that i keep them to myself. and that means you cant treat me anyhow you like ok. i'm just so angry with some of my fucking friends. how they treat me so nicely when they have a problem and needs my help or when i have something that they want. wow. how they treated me. now, when i dont have anything and they dont have any problem. they just discard me. leave me. treat me with such cold stares and remarks. theres just this tingling feeling in my heart that i cant describe. but i can tell you, its painful.

now, i dont know who to turn to. b'cos its so painful, i want to cry. i want to turn to you but i'm afraid i will just be a burden to you or hurt you.

and i still dont understand, maybe i will never be able to. why are you so unreasonable? i didnt mean to hurt you and i feel sad that i did. so sad i feel like i want to... i dont know. why,why?

theres just something stuck in my throat now. my eyes feels hot. whatever la. i want to start drawing now.

ah, i do have someone to turn to. GOD.

PS happy chinese new year. bak kua, kua, kua. HAHAHA.


chiao.

i feel good :)

this weeks been like..i-dont-care-anymore kinda week. 'cos i'm like already in a holiday mood. tomoprrow dikir performance in front of the school. i am sssoo egg-cited!!! wohooo! yesterday's prac was a bomb! then econs test. i feel quite ggod about it. but no, too confident is bad.

and. i've been getting sick these few days. again. yes again. like what the hell right. i've been eating panadols for like days. and my stupid fever still wont subside. oh well. cong says i work too hard. hah, i wish man. i seriously wish thats the situation now. haha. ahw.. gtg for PE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
i feel gooddddddddddddd.
hahahahha.

chiao.