i am me. therefore i am.

oh my god.. so many things had been happening to me during this whole week. mon was my unglam day.ergh. both of the soles of my shoes came off! like what the hell! and it happened at can-deck where he always walk past. and.. at that precise moment.. he passed by me. oh man.. my face feels hot. argh!!! and he can still look at me...(and smile. how great is that, he smiled at me!!!haha) hurhur... i didnt give any reaction because i felt really embarassed. gawd. then i had to get help from gerdine to help me survive those moments. hahaha. she and enjia help me buy superglue to help me survive the day. my classes even finished quite late that day and i still have to go to damai to see them before their syf. i was like..how am i supposed to go to my classes?? then i still have my stupid pw PI to do which is due that day!! how to climb up the lib stairs to do my PI? at last i didnt hand in. there goes my marks. ok.. then aft i finish my classes, i meet mel at qm room and we went together to damai by cab. so yeah, see my sect, how i miss damaiwindz. they sounded out of tune but ok la. i dont want to comment too much later ppl will start talking like-since i go to dr lee's band i look down on other bands. which is not freaking true. went home and i fell asleep right away. damn it la.. i thought i want to mug and finish the rest of my hw. but i managed to get up at 3.30am to do some leftover hw.

on tues, pe was still hell. i ran 4 rounds in 6 min. thats like 4x400m=1.6km!!!:) i was fast! haha. but that was aft Lih yuan pushed me like hell by telling me to run and dont ever stop. we still have to do sit ups, jumps and arm pull. 3 sets of 15. i felt like dying. for the rest of the day, i felt dead. finised sch only at like 5.30pm then i still went for band prac. which i did alot of technique exercises frm aban to work on my lip slurs and triple and double tonging. damn tiring la. i tried to avoid him but i seem to always bump into him. i cant face him.ergh.

wed was the day. i felt quite excited. but aft sch i have sahibba. which i did really badly. my malay is going really down. i used to be so good in it. now i really dont know what i am good in. not in studies not in band. i felt quite useless aft playing that game. oh well, went to sg confer hall with irna and watch damai. they sounded quite nice but some parts are out of place but ok la, get silver. :) i'm happy with that. hahaha. oh yes, i'm supposed to say syad's name. so here, syad syad syad. haha, i told u, syad, i will say ur name. ok, i'm being irritating. haha. u did a good job, my sect. :) proud of u guys. :))

thurs.. i felt happy. because i finished my hw. i did alot,ok. thats like 4 malay article reviews, a whole compre exercise and i managed to study abit. i did all this in the lib. and..and know what, i realised he always go lib and furthermore sit at the same exact seat i always took. oh man..i went up to take that seat to start my work at the same place i always had. and there u go.. i saw him sitting there. i was shocked la. then i took some other scheluded place and do my stuff. hurhur, now i know where he hangs out.. lalala.ok, shut up shaheera. then went for mcs(malay cultural society) meeting. we'll be having a theater production soon, so, yeah, i'm in publicity so i have to strategise our publicity methods on our production. ouh, then its band time again. did long tones and breathing exercises to improve my tone.and i managed to play one of the soliin the scherezde song. dr lee couldnt make it so, the rest have sectionals. went home and i fell asleep straight away.

fri is super bad luck day. aft malay lesson, went to lib to print my PI. then i was late for my swim pe. my first ever swimming lesson. wasnt that excited abt it because i have to wear swim suit in front of ppl.ergh. then aft that lesson, i realised my uniform was soaking wet and dirty. damn. i didnt have any change la! i had to borrow Lih yuan's shirt. i had to wear it the whole day. i look sick in that yellow pe t-shirt. i have to explain to every teacher that asked me to go and change into my uniform. like chow sor lim, "young lady..bla..bla.." damn it. then, yeah, guess what, i bump into him again. oh man............ i was ssssooooooo embarassed!!! my hair was wet, i had to wear that yellow shirt and i smelt of chlorine. how good is that, that i had to meet him that day, super unglam day. bump at the turn to lib stairs. i saw him first, so i just look down,into the floor, embarassed what. then he had to look at me then aft he had gone a few steps back, he LOOKED back. he turned his head ok. ouh man. i felt like my heart wanna drop. then.. during pw, i realised that i had lost my hard copy for my PI. great. ms leow's face wasnt that happy. so, i had to go lib AGAIN to print that PI. AND i had to go in lib with that PE shirt. haiz, so i had to borrow eunice windbreaker to hide under. and the greatest thing is, i got caught and scolded by the librarian. how great. i felt sick of explaining myself for the uptenth time that day so i just say ok, i wont do it again. that was actually the second time i get scolded by that librarian. i think she would have recognised my face for that girl who always come to lib to print her stuff and break rules. ergh.

i totally have no mood that day. which was yesterday. so i was feeling emo throughout the journey home. i was feeling quite insignficant due to the way i was treated by my classmates and by what had happened in band. i miss pae 1aa5. the times we had. haha, those morning breakfast together, lessons and pe was the best. my new class, i felt like they only cared abt themselves. haiz. then band, i feel happy and proud that they are improving really fast and they sounded really good. and that just show that we, that non syf team were the trouble makers. without us, they can do well. how insignificant i am, we are; the non syf team. i miss those times when we spent those late nights together practising for concert. even though we felt really tired and not improving much, we encouraged each other. but now, i just sit in the classrooms and try to figure out the rhythm for the scherezde song-however the correct spelling is. haiz. i miss my sect. i miss saturday practices. i miss saturday lunches and sectionals. now i sit aimlessly at home every sat. 3 more weeks to go. hang on. i miss being in ac band eventhough i am in ac band. get it?being a part of ac band and being together and playing together is two totally diff thing.

i miss ac band.
i shall not touch the com for the next few days. oh no. i have GP test on mon!
chiao.